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28th amendment not needed

Published 9:49am Thursday, August 29, 2013 Updated 11:50am Thursday, August 29, 2013

Some people are proposing a 28th Amendment to the United States Constitution: “Congress shall make no law that applies to the citizens of the United States that does not apply equally to the Senators and/or Representatives; and, Congress shall make no law that applies to the Senators and/or Representatives that does not apply equally to the citizens of the United States …”

So I got this in an email from a friend. Obviously, there are intelligent people out there who think we can sneak something like this past Congress. I know, they’re taking advantage of us, because they simply have more money behind them than we do. However, there is a solution.

DON’T VOTE AN INCUMBENT BACK INTO OFFICE! That’s how complicated this is. There are always two or more choices; pick another one. Before they have time to figure out how to game the system, we’ll vote’em out and put another one in.

But you’re not going to, are you. (Statement, not question.) You’re not because you still believe they’re going to do something special for you, right? Getting Congress to pass a law limiting themselves? Yeah, right. A snowball in hell has more chance. More chance even than voters figuring out they already have a solution.

But, when it comes to weird laws, here are some more, from the Internet.



· In Los Angeles, it is not legal to bathe two babies at the same time in the same tub.

· In Riverside, kissing on the lips, unless both parties wipe their lips with carbonized rose water, is against the local health ordinance. (The whole town has bad breath, apparently.)

· In Walnut, no person shall wear a mask or disguise on a public street without a permit from the sheriff.



· According to a law in China, you must be intelligent to go to college. (Guess the guy who wrote this did NOT go to college.)



· A state law requires that a man’s female companion shall call him “master” while out on a date. The law does not apply to married couples. (Rats! This had promise.)

· In Zion, It is illegal for anyone to give cats, dogs, or other domesticated animals a lighted cigar. 


· In Ottumwa, It is illegal for any man, within the corporate city limits, to wink at any female with whom he is “unacquainted.” (I’ve been in Ottumwa. Just lucky, I guess)


· In Baltimore, It is illegal to take a lion to the movies.


· Many municipalities in Minnesota (including Anoka County) still have a Vagrancy law on the books that makes it misdemeanor for a person, with ability to work, who is without lawful means of support, and does not seek employment, and is not under 18 years of age.


· A state law prohibits the seduction of a female over the age of eighteen by promised or pretended marriage.


· It is not legal for a tavern owner to serve beer unless a nice kettle of soup is also brewing.


New York

· It is against the law to throw a ball at someone’s head for fun.

· A license must be purchased before hanging clothes on a clothesline.

· A fine of $25 can be levied for flirting. This old law specifically prohibits men from turning around on any city street and looking “at a woman in that way.” A second conviction for a crime of this magnitude calls for the violating male to be forced to wear a “pair of horse-blinders” wherever and whenever he goes outside for a stroll. (I’m not going to go to New York.)

· In Carmel, A man cannot be seen in public while wearing a jacket and pants that do not match.

· In Greene, during a concert, it is illegal to eat peanuts and walk backwards on the sidewalks.

· In Ocean City, It is illegal to eat in the street in residential neighborhoods, and the only beverage you can drink on the beach is water in a clear plastic bottle.

· In Ocean City, It is illegal for men to go topless in the center of town.

· In Staten Island, You may only water your lawn if the hose is held in your hand.

The list goes on. Who knew?


Alan Linda is a New York Mills resident.

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