Calendar entries show flow of life

By Debbie Irmen (Contact) | The Daily Journal

Published Thursday, March 20, 2008

My grandma used to keep a journal and while I’ve always had the best intentions, my journal-keeping is sporadic at best.

Whenever I’d visit my grandparents, I always picked up Grandma’s journal and turned back a few pages to find the entry that said, “Debbie and family coming Friday.”

Then I’d read through her entries until our anticipated date of arrival to find out who else had stopped by, who they had played cards with and the daily weather, which Grandma recorded religiously.

On occasion, I’d read that my grandparents had seen a cardinal at their bird feeder or about the antics of a squirrel trying to raid the feeders.

It was all entertaining and Grandma didn’t mind me reading it — she always left it out on the counter or the kitchen table or where ever she had last written in it. I found out later that others in the family also read the journal when they visited.

Rather than keeping a journal, I keep my calendars. Whether I use a wall calendar or a day planner, I save them and while unpacking a box recently, ran across a few of them.

I immediately stopped the unpacking to thumb through them and was surprised to find they were my own journal of sorts.

I have a poor memory — I sometimes can’t remember the year I was married; and I always have to stop and think about what year the kids were born. So it was interesting to see what was happening in my life in 1994, ‘95 and ‘96.

On Jan. 9, 1995, the entry reads “Put Zak to sleep.” My beloved cat, at 14, had been getting sicker and sicker and finally, I had to put him down. That entry really doesn’t tell the whole story: I asked the veterinarian to come to the house to put him down, which he did. My mom and daughter also were there and we gathered strength from each other.

There has always been an argument in our house about when we picked up Fraizer. I knew it was right around the same time as we put Zak down, but none of us could remember the year or other circumstances with any conviction. Now we know, on Jan. 11, we picked up Fraizer (yes, he was named after Kelsey Grammer, whom I adore.)

While one entry takes me back and helps me recall all the details of the event, others are completely baffling, such as this one: “Bulldozers Meeting.” I have no clue what that is all about. Never have I sat in a bulldozer, or driven a bulldozer or even ridden in a bulldozer. So why I might be going to a bulldozer meeting I just can’t say.

I so rarely get sick that it apparently warranted a calendar notation on Jan. 25.

It was fun to see what community activities caught my interest 12 years ago, too. There were numerous Scouting entries — that was the time when my son was in Cub Scouts and I served on the council. Those were hectic days.

I was a member of BPW, played volleyball, read for the blind, ran Vicki to dance classes and Ryan to basketball or wrestling or football, depending on the season. Oh, and I worked full time.

On Dec. 15, 1994, I took my daughter to the Nutcracker, in West Fargo. She has always loved the performance and I surprised her with the tickets.

November must have been a popular time for me to visit family in Massachusetts — in both 1994 and 1996, I flew into Boston, where I was picked up by my family and shuttled to Cape Cod, where they lived.

One entry which covers two days on my calendar is not in my handwriting. Apparently, my mom stopped by, because the entry starts out, “Hi ladybug,” and instructs me to “Don’t worry be Happy! from Me.”

Mom’s nickname for me is Ladybug and the annoyingly upbeat song, Don’t Worry Be Happy,” must have been a hit.

Some entries were run-of-the-mill: Doctors or dentists appointments, time made for grocery shopping or hair cuts.

These calendar entries are more telling than they immediately reveal — individually they detail the activities of an average person, but cumulatively, give meaning to that life.

Debbie Irmen’s column runs Thursdays.