Birthdays should be a big deal

By Debbie Irmen (Contact) | The Daily Journal

Published Thursday, January 31, 2008

Debbie Irmen

I’ll be celebrating a birthday next week (without doing the math, I can’t remember anymore how old I’ll be; though many of my friends, who are older never let me forget) and was curious about how the tradition started.

As a child, because I have a February birthday, my cake was always heart-shaped and frosted in pink. When I got older and had children of my own, the heart-shaped cakes stopped coming. One year, I semi-whined how I missed it and Mom restarted the tradition.

Birthdays were a big deal when I was kid: We could get away with almost anything on our birthday, though we rarely took advantage of it. To this day, the day of birth is a special occasion — I don’t care who is celebrating it.

A friend just turned 60 earlier this week and didn’t want a big to-do made about it. Not because he has a phobia about turning older (at least I don’t think that’s the reason), but because he figures it’s just another day.

I think differently. I told him to rewatch “It’s a Wonderful Life.” Each person has an impact on the people he knows and we celebrate the day of their birth because we appreciate the impact of this person on our lives. It is robbing other people of this opportunity to say what we don’t say 365 days of the year when one wishes to forgo the celebration, to my way of thinking.

The tradition of celebrating birthdays actually dates back a long time ago — no one seems to know exactly when — in Europe. And like all good things, is shrouded in evil.

The tradition of birthday parties started in Europe a long time ago. It was feared that evil spirits were particularly attracted to people on their birthdays. To protect them from harm, friends and family would to come be with the birthday person and bring good thoughts and wishes. Giving gifts brought even more good cheer to ward off the evil spirits. This is how birthday parties began.

At first it was only kings who were recognized as important enough to have a birthday celebration (maybe this is how the tradition of birthday crowns began?). As time went by, children became included in birthday celebrations. The first children's birthday parties occurred in Germany and were called Kinderfeste. (from kidsparties.com)

I also looked up birthday traditions in other countries, thinking it couldn’t be all that different from what we do in the U.S. I was wrong. Here’s a sampling of other cultures.

n Africa — Initiation Ceremonies. In various African nations they hold initiation ceremonies for groups of children instead of birthdays. When children reach a certain designated age, they learn the laws, beliefs, customs, songs and dances of their tribes.

n Aruba — Children take a treat to school for their classmates and all teachers. Each teacher receives a treat and gives the birthday child a small gift like a pencil, an eraser or a postcard. The birthday child is also allowed to wear special clothes instead of the school uniform.

n Canada — Greasing the nose with butter or margarine. In Atlantic Canada (Nova Scotia, Prince Edward Island, New Brunswick and Newfoundland) the birthday child is ambushed and their nose is greased for good luck. The greased nose makes the child too slippery for bad luck to catch them. This tradition is reputed to be of Scottish decent.

n England — Fortune Telling Cakes and Bumps. Certain symbolic objects are mixed into the birthday cake as it being prepared. If your piece of cake has a coin in it, then you will be rich. Also, when it’s your birthday your friends give you the "bumps" they lift you in the air by your hands and feet and raise you up and down to the floor, one for each year then one for luck, two for luck and three for the old man's coconut!

n Latvia — Lifting the chair. The birthday person sits in a chair and friends and familiy lift the chair one time for each year. The traditional birthday cake is a yellow cake called "klingeris"

n Nepal — Mark on the forehead. A certain mixture of rice yogurt and color is placed on the birthday child's forehead for good luck.

n Norway — Birthday day. The birthday child stands out in front of their class and chooses a friend to share a little dance while the rest of the class sings a happy birthday song.

n South Africa — Presentation of a key at age twenty-one. On the twenty-first birthday a key made of anything from paper to aluminum foil to silver to gold is presented by the parents as a sign that the child is ready to unlock the door to their future.

n United States — Cake, candles and song. A cake is made, and candles are put on top based on how old the person is. Then everyone sings the "happy birthday" song, and at the end of the song, the birthday child blows out the candles. If they blow them all out with one blow, their birthday wishes will come true.

Debbie Irmen’s column runs on Thursdays.